Sick, but posting (don't expect much)

First it's just life getting busy. Then it's the holidays. Now I'm sick.

I was not destined to be a daily blogger apparently. Ah well. Isn't it the thought that counts?

This is a quick touch base because I really want to go back to bed and drink more hot tea - not necessarily in that order.

Well, after the last post it went back and stayed at 218 for a bit but I kept at it of course. I took a day off on Thanksgiving. Figured how could I possibly track all that home cooked food? I even ate a Happy Meal for lunch that day. What a rebel.

Today is my second day in a row at 214 which is wonderful - but part of me says it isn't real as I've been sick and just not as hungry as I might have been. The old rule was, 2 days in a row = the weight is real, so I'm going with it.

Haven't exercised in heavens knows how long. Sure, I've walked around the malls and been more active in some daily ways - but nothing as solid as going to the gym. The Girlfriend and I were talking just the other day and I said that at this rate we might as well just buy a treadmill because at $55 a month we could have bought one by now and hopefully we would have used it more if it was in the house. But I really did love that Pilates class. And I really do like going to the gym. Oh well. For today I'm not going because I'm sick. If excuses keep outnumbering my gym days, I may have to re-think that membership.

My biggest news? I'm eating carrots. Not right now, but I'm eating them on a regular basis. Cold with dinner. Chopped in salads. Shredded in sandwiches. I'm shocked. I never thought I'd do that. And I have a feeling that's just an "entry" veggie. Today I chopped up some celery, onion and apple into my chicken salad. Yesterday I bought jicama to put into my salad some time this week. It may be a slow process to bring veggies back into regular circulation - but as with everything else here I know baby steps will get me a lot farther than doing nothing had ever done for me!

One calorie. One work out. One veggie. One post. One step at a time.

Another baby step forward

217!!!!!!

Never before has such a big number looked so small! After 2 weeks of hanging out with 220, this was a wonderful surprise this morning. Even if I move around a bit, I'm ok with that from day to day. But to finally see a new low number is just amazing!

When walking by a mirror this afternoon something in my head said - I have more neck. And sure enough - I seem to have just the tiniest bit more neck and less chin today. Funny how that stuff works... But there is was. Or should I say wasn't...

So, I miss fast food (Oh Taco Bell, you sweet mistress...), I miss our traditional home cooked meals (Fried chicken, Fried pork chops, Fried catfish... you get the idea), and I SOOOO miss going out to eat all the time - but I don't miss the extra pounds at ALL. :)

Goals: Through the eyes of others

Today I put out a request to one of the groups I'm in on TDP (That's The Daily Plate for those of you that haven't been paying attention) to get their advice. I've been no lower than 220 since Oct 27th, with 7 days between now and then being a bit higher. So, I asked them to look at what I was eating, and the exercise I was tracking and tell me what I'm doing wrong.

I think they did a great job - though all saw something different. Here are the basics. Eat more fresh fruit and veggies. Eat more fiber. Eat more in general - my calories are again slipping too low. Watch out for sodium. Get a regular work out routine that includes both cardio and weight training.

Simple enough right? Except I knew all these things needed to happen before. I've become MUCH more aware of sodium. I know I'm not eating enough fruits and veggies and I'm trying to make it more of a conscious thing. Haven't found that magical formula yet. And yes - I know I need to work out more regularly. I think The Girlfriend and I go back and forth blaming who's at fault for us not going. Right now I'm not going because I've been working long hours, then coming home to make dinner (freaking cooking taking all that time...) and then working on my big event this weekend. So yea - no gym time. I'd like that to change next week, but seriously - during Thanksgiving? I don't think so...

Here's what I saw when I read it all. I need to have a plan. I need to know what I'm going to eat for dinner when I leave for work so I know if it's a big snack day or a light one. I need to plan when I'm getting in those fruits and veggies. I need to know that it's going to be a heavy sodium dinner to I need to take a light sodium lunch. And I need to plan for the gym.

I have a sick fantasy about getting up early and going to the gym before work. But I'm a night person - NOT a morning person. Not sure I could really pull that one off. If I haven't come up with a better plan by January though - I think I might have to give it a shot. Maybe.

Crap. We'll see.

Let's get through Thanksgiving first.

Salad vs. Burger: And the loser is...

Why does a salad cost twice as much as a burger?

Seriously.

Why?

I'm asking.

I'm not just talking about some foo foo salad at a fancy restaurant either. I'm talking iceberg lettuce, dry carrot strips and a squishy cherry tomato. If I made that at home - 25 cents? Heck, even with retail costs I'm guessing it could be done for no more then 12 cents. But at some fast food place they think they're being nice by putting it on the 99 cent menu. Showing that they have gone healthy. (See folks, fast food isn't bad for you - we have salads!) Ya know what else is on that 99 cent menu? A bacon double cheese burger. A quarter pound double stack. A southwest barbecue burger. The list gets bigger every day.

I can't make a quarter pound double cheese burger for 12 cents. Beef is expensive. Farmers have to buy the seed to grow barley and hay and grass and whatever else cows eat. They have to pay for someone to harvest it. Farmers have to pay to grow the cows. Manufacturing plants have to pay their workers to... um... make the animal a food product that no longer vividly resembles an animal. Truckers have to load and deliver - paying more and more for the gas. Then there are most likely half a dozen middle men before it actually gets to market somewhere in between all that. Then what? After all those folks have been paid and have had to pay, Fast Food Buyer A gets their product. Then they have to pay for it to go through some processing plant to put it into perfectly sized patties. Saves time, costs money. Then those perfectly shaped patties are boxed and sent via all sorts of shipping methods (which do not run cheap for heavy frozen items) to get them to Fast Food Store A. Now what all that is happening, someone is doing the same thing with the wheat that makes the bun, and even the companies cranking out that special sauce. None of it's natural - and it takes a lot of work.

So how is that hamburger equal in cost on the Dollar Menu to rapidly browning iceberg lettuce?

The lust for beef money ruins rain forests. In High School I remember learning how many acres of the rain forest had been destroyed by McDonald's alone as some of those farmers were expanding their farms as beef sold at such a high price - but those dang trees were getting in the way of their fields.

The drive for heartier beef leads good hearted farmers to make decisions they would rather not do including smaller areas, hormones and anything else that he hears might help him to get an extra $1 per head for his heard.

The craving for beef is enough that even when folks know they shouldn't eat it, they order it in massive quantities. McDonald's Triple Cheeseburger. Burger King's Quad Stacker. Ordering 10-20 White Castles. We do it because we can. Because it tastes good. We know it's not good for us, we know we're hurting ourselves. But....

A burger costs as much as an iceberg lettuce salad. Costs just as much, but won't leave you hungry when you're done. When you're hungry, which one feels like the better value? It's just not a fair game they're playing.

And before you walk away - want fries with that?

Why is liquid so heavy?

So. Tired.

Must. Write. Blog.

Well, it's not quite that bad YET but the night is still young. On the way home from work, rather than stop at the gym, I stopped at church for my work out. Oh yes. My work out. And on a cool night I broke a sweat.

We're doing a open mic/coffee shop kind of a thing this week. We're hoping to make this a monthly thing. It's kinda my baby. I've been looking forward to doing this for awhile now. It's very exciting.

What's not so exciting is carrying up cases of soda, Iced Tea, Apple juice, Soy Milk, and the other various liquid and solid substances that will be going in our little cafe - UP a flight of stairs at night with no outdoor light in shoes that slip off even more easily than they slip on. I'll say there was definitely prayer involved. Good spot for it I figure...

So I haven't been to the gym in FAR too long again, but I figure today counts as a work out. I went up and down the stairs about 4-5 times each way, plus my trips into the kitchen and then there's all the lifting and carrying. I'm going to guess it's about equal to 20 min on the treadmill. Fingers crossed.

Maybe Mr. Scale will chose to honor me with a dip down tomorrow morning? Or maybe not. But one can always hope.

To shred or not to shred...

I have a great paper shredder. It rocks. It can shred paper or even credit cards. In a world of identity theft and constant pre-approved credit card offers, I considered it a mandatory thing.

But all that changed not long ago.

My recycling center no longer accepts shredded paper. Apparently shredded paper clogs the sorting machine. My first thought was - if ever individual who has a recycling can paid $1-3 more per month I'm sure we could afford a few workers to do a pre-sort of the recycle stuff to ensure that it wasn't an issue. But then I realized - it gets everywhere. I've gone to pull something that was accidentally tossed from the recycling can and it was a disaster. I can only imagine how awful it would be once everything was dumped in the truck. [Note, we have on trash can and one recycle can. All stuff goes in the same can and then is dumped into a "recycle truck" once a week] This isn't even the worst issue for our local recycling center. Can't tell you how many folks I've seen with bagged things (No bags allowed), tree trimmings (no nature!), soda boxes (can't be recycled due to plastic film), and more stuffed into the recycle container. I recently found out that my city pays over $250K a year to truck the "trash" from the recycle center over to the dump each year. Are you kidding me? That is insane! And with the price of gas going up - that number is only going to get higher.

Back to my original thought here. So, I called the credit associations to put myself on the list to not get pre-approved offers anymore. Some still trickle in, but I'm hoping that will end soon. But what do I do with it all?

Currently my plan is to go through each piece slowly looking for any identifiable piece of info or a special code reserved just for me - and I rip that off and shred just that chunk. If it's several times on the same piece of paper, the whole thing gets shredded. But MAN that takes SO much more time!

So here I am, spending 30-45 extra minutes of earth loving, identity protecting time reading, reviewing checking, making piles and shredding. Thinking to myself over and over - to shred or not to shred? Protect my identity, or protect the earth? But when I see the pile of shredded paper going into the trash, I can't help but think that there should be away for me to do both at the same time.

Let them eat cake!

I've been taking cake decorating classes. Yes, not the healthiest hobby to pursue, but I grew up with a love for it. My Aunt used to decorate cakes. I spent hours and hours of my childhood flipping through Wilton cake decorating books. Always on the look out for a) What I thought was cool b)What I wanted for my next birthday and c) How I wanted my wedding cake to look.

I still have clear pictures of cakes I STILL want for my next birthday (There's one I desperately wanted for my 30th that never quite happened. 3 dimensional teddy bear sitting in a wagon. Bout a foot wide, foot and a half long and bit over a foot tall. If I don't get it before then I'll make it for myself by my 40th!) and I remember all the funky 70's - 80's things that I thought would be SO cool - stairs and water fountains. Now, these are cheesy. Then, they were an architectural and technological marvel. Well - to an 8 year old.)

So anyhow, I'm now taking classes in the same place where my aunt used to buy her cake based goods. I remember coming here as a kid too. Still owned by the same family. Still looks the same. She might have even taken classes here - I was too young to remember those details.

But I remember the cakes. Smelling them bake. Watching her prepare. Watching her create something of beauty out of nothing in particular except flour and sugar.

Being healthy is important. Of the 2 cakes made this weekend, I will have one small slice of each - enough to be social as 1 is going to a party for a friend and the other is going to church. This isn't the most "healthy choice" in terms of calories. But when I see other folks oooh and aah over a cake I've made, the same way they used to do for my aunt, it feels oh so healthy on a much higher level.

Healthy isn't just about calories and sodium and sugar intake. It's about being a better person. Feeling better about who you are, what you bring and what you leave behind.

Today I made cakes, took a class, and then hung out with friends all day. I should have eaten better and had more water to drink. But that doesn't matter today. Today I fed my spirit. And it's definitely not on a diet.

To my regular reader - Part 2

220?

Why Mr. Scale, you shouldn't have?

Actually you should. And you know it. But we already had that conversation yesterday didn't we?

You've earned another day, safe, on the floor.

Keep it up.

To my regular reader:

Apparently I have one regular reader.

MY SCALE!

I guess it didn't like me talking about it last night. I guess it thought it was funny. I guess it thought it would show me who's who.

Today - 225.

I haven't been that high since October 18th - almost a month ago. But today - it taunts me.

Well I have news for you Mr. Scale. You may have the power of the numbers, but I have the power of the garbage truck. Want to see how those digits love the compressor at the dump? Just keep it up. The real estate you have on my bathroom floor is on a day-to-day lease that can be revoked at any time. You don't even give me decimals. You can easily be replaced by a newer, prettier and more agreeable machine. Mess with me - I mess with you. Keep mama happy and your spot is secured.

You've been warned.

My tug of war

It's been a week now. Even a few days more than that. And nothing. Nothing. It shouldn't bother me but... it does. And I don't know how much longer I can take it.

I haven't lost a pound.

Well, that may not be true based on the day of the week. Let's just say my body is apparently losing in it's tug of war over 2 pounds. Lose 2. Gain one. Lose one. Gain two. Lose two. Gain One. Lose one. Gain two.

I'm going a bit batty. So, I looked at what I've been eating. I knew my sodium was too high. Every day I made at least one sodium error but I tried to balance it out with lots and lots of water. Apparently that wasn't quite enough.

So, today I bought fruit before work (though I was so busy at work I didn't eat any - but I've sworn I will tomorrow) and I got fresh veggies and more fruit on the way home. We made a stir fry tonight with left over chicken and fresh veggies and brown rice and doesn't that sound good? When I ate it, all I could taste was the sodium. The left over marinade from the chicken apparently cooked down enough that it just tasted really salty. Sigh...

I'm not going to stop eating "healthy" just because I'm not seeing results. I'm just going to try to eat better and better and bring in more activity. I can't be at a plateau on week 3. It just doesn't work like that. Or does it?

I might just have to cave in and buy a new scale. The Evil Scale is looking more and more menacing each day. And yet I get on. Not quite believing - but hoping.

Just another day - in a good way

Ok, so I missed a day. I tried. I did. But it was not meant to be.

But, in the spirit of my new lifestyle/diet, I will continue on as one day's error does not a ruined diet/lifestyle make. Or something like that.

I worked at home today (WOO HOO!) which was lovely. No wasted gas. No AC even on most of the day. Used only sunlight to light my way. Just my two computers chugging along. Yea, 2 computers. Not the best ecological decision, but unfortunately a requirement for now. I'd like to think that in the end I came out ahead on the ecological points game.

Staying home is also great for food choices. I was hesitant that I'd give in the the bags of Doritos or the Nutter Butters in the pantry. But no. Didn't grab a snack all day. At work when I'm looking for an escape or have free time, I end up thinking about food. At home I pet the cat, go put away some dishes or get something ready for dinner. There are SO many other options available that food is automatically demoted in the "think about it" list.

Thinking smart and making good choices. That's what it's all about.

Under the wire, over the limit

Why is healthy so hard? Restaurant I went to today had no real healthy options. Sure, side salad w/ no dressing and you'll be ok. Beyond that? Nada. Major city, and located downtown. And this isn't some burger joint. We're talking lobster bisque, custom pizzas and steaks. But not one blessed simple non-high-calorie meal. They had a whole low carb section - but for a low calorie gal the bacon and cheese etc in each of those sort of took off the shine there.

One blessed chicken breast/broccoli and rice kind of dish. That's all I want. Maybe a salad with low fat dressing and grilled instead of fried chicken to top it? Something? So, I had to eat something bad for me. I picked one of the better of the options - but I won't let that happen again. I could feel the extra calories meeting their friends and holding on tight.

Sigh...how's a girl supposed to eat independently, locally and healthy while maintaining a busy life?

Death by embarrasment

I think I may have mortally embarrassed The Girlfriend today.

We went to dinner, and while I chose one of the best places in the area - I knew that evil calories and sodium lurked behind every innocent chicken breast and lettuce leaf. So I did what any responsible dieter would do. I asked to see the restaurant's nutritional information guide.

It was almost a fatal blow. She tried to convince me it wasn't necessary. She did the hand over the eyes "you can't see me" move to the waiter. It wasn't pretty.

A few moments later when our server returned with a 3 inch binder filled with nutritional information he cautioned, "It's not good. You won't like anything you see here. You might not even want to look before you order." Kinda ruins the whole thing then, doesn't it?

So, turns out I'd picked the best item on the menu before I even got the nutritional info. After the pat on my back - I was overwhelmed by the sodium content. Over 2K mg's for chicken tacos?? Are these things brined before they're cooked? I don't get it. It's insane. 5 gigantic glasses of water later (ok, 3) I was hoping I'd helped to even the score, yet privately knew it wasn't true. I still needed to make up for the half of a smoked turkey leg from the State Fair last night. Not pretty. But darn tasty - and better than the Fry Bread taco I really really wanted. Much better.

3 days in a row huh? I think I'm impressed with myself. And not just for the blogging.

Nice...

Dia de los Challenge!

Yesterday, I accepted a challenge to write an entry every day. It wasn't even my challenge, and I took it anyway.

Yesterday there was also a posting in a group I'm a part of on TDP that issued a challenge. A much more important challenge. I thought about it ALL day. As of today, I've officially accepted. The goal is to be UNDER 200 lbs by the end of the year.

This is going to be freakishly hard. 20 lbs in 2 months may not seem like an outrageous amount to some folks but I honestly can not remember the last time I was under 200. I am pretty sure it happened when I lived in my apartment - but as that was 7 years of time, it doesn't exactly narrow things down TOO much. Some time between 23 and 30 - but I know it wasn't near the latter end. I'd guess 25ish. But I'm just not sure at all.

No matter how hard it seems though - I am amazed at the idea that I could be celebrating the new year at under 200! I tried to get The Girlfriend to get pumped about it. But Law and Order was on so I was just some pest interrupting her TV QT. She eventually said something like "I'm already trying to do that. So, sure, whatever you have to do." So...yea... she's pumped.

As a side note - what's up w/ me accepting challenges? That is SO not who I used to be!

Oh - and for those of you playing along at home - yes, I've lost some more weight. I'm at 220. The heavens didn't open or anything, in fact I've been popping back and forth a bit around there the last week. But I think it's here to stay now.

Now I just need for it to go - with 20 more of it's friends. :)

Accepting the challenge I didn't get

As I was saying to myself, Self, you haven't posted lately. Have you been so driven by the counting of calories that you've forgotten your old friend the blog? And I answered back, No Self, not really. I just haven't been particularly inspired. And is it better to blog about nothing, or to wait until you have something of value to say?

Well, later that day I saw that my friend (who blogs quite a bit) had just accepted a challenge to blog every day this month. He felt he was setting himself up for failure. Somehow, the idea of it inspired me. Hey - maybe I have something to talk about after all?

So - I'm going to try it. Can I make it every day for 30 days? Should be fun to find out.