The Doctor: Part 1, No good excuses

I've worked on being better to the environment. I've worked on awareness for what I put into my body. I've made good strides in turning that healthy corner. One thing I hadn't done, for almost 4 years, is go to the Dr.

Now, I'm in no way one of those people that fears the Doctor. I like my Doctor and while I'm no fan of needles or giving blood, I would never let that stop me from going. So what has stopped me? Well, first I had no insurance. For about a year my job had no benefits. Then, I went through a series of jobs that had benefits - but required about 18 hours out of each day leaving little time to even think about the Dr, much less make a phone call - and I couldn't imagine taking time out of my busy day for a check up. But now, I certainly have the time. And, thanks to the reduced rate Cobra benefits for the rest of the year, I also have insurance.

My plan had been to go for a basic check up, but when I get there I find out that for a series of different reasons relating to the insurance - I actually need to schedule that as a separate visit. But, she asks me if there is anything particular that I'd like to discuss with her at this appointment. And I did...

I think it's only natural that when a person loses weight they begin to analyze all of their body's parts and sizes a bit more intently than they did before. While doing this sort of pinching, poking and prodding, I felt something that I had not felt before. A bit of a hard lump in my gut. I pulled over The Girlfriend for a comparison and while I felt something there with her, mine seemed bigger. I figured it was period related based on when I felt it. Then, over the next few months I noticed that it wasn't really changing in size based on "that time of the month". Seemed strange, but I figured it wasn't any big deal. I called it "My Tumor" much to The Girlfriend's distaste. She would routinely give the Arnold-esque response "It's not a tumor!". But who has time to check, right?

Recently I realized that while I had not lost any weight or done something to change my perspective on it, My Tumor had gotten a bit bigger. When lying flat on the ground, that side was just a bit higher than the other. It was time to go the Doctor, but I faced the fear that should I go to the Dr, if for any reason my coverage lapsed this would be counted as a pre-existing condition. With no clear job in sight, that it a scary proposition.

"Actually Dr., I have this weird lump I noticed..."

She has me lie down and without me even pointing it out she goes right to it. Next thing I know I'm being referred to get an ultrasound to check it out and she's confirming that I'm all done having children. What?? Um, no, I hadn't started yet. This seems to be a concern for her. The mass is in my uterus which right now feels as if I were 5 months pregnant. She mentions there is likely something that can be done about it if I still really want to have children. We both agree to cross that bridge when we have a better feeling for exactly what is happening.

Next week I will be getting an ultrasound, and my first mammogram.

The Doctor wasn't scared, so I won't be either. That's not to say I'm not anxious. I am.

Fingers crossed.