And the light went on

I had a radical thought the other day when it came to weight loss. Maybe not radical for some, but it was like a light went off for me.

This isn't how I have to be forever.

Ok, that may not seem like much, but it was how it all began. So I've been eating healthy, tried to do more physical things including going to the gym. And for a few minutes it all felt so futile. There was this feeling that it was never going to end. Salad. Chicken. Fish. Reading labels. But then it hit me. I don't have to do this forever. Now, I don't mean being overweight as ya might think. It was all about the realization that YES, this sucks. And NO it is not fun. BUT - Dieting doesn't last forever.

Sure, we want to be healthy, we want to maintain. But it's a whole different thing to maintain where you are than to try to make your body work in reverse - burning up more than you're giving it each day. Maintaining means I need to maintain a level of good food and activity - but if I feel like not going to the gym for a month, it won't kill me. And if I feel like some chocolate pudding now and then, cool. As long as all these things are done understanding their potential for cumulative damage - thus done carefully, then no biggie. Somehow that's completely changed my attitude. Yes, eating this good all the time is no fun. But it won't last forever.

One of the hardest things for me so far have been times where I pretty much HAD to eat badly. Pizza place w/ 3 friends all wanting to share one? Fine, I had pizza. 15 minutes to get to church meeting after work - ok, I'll get drive though, but it will be the healthiest (least good tasting) thing on their menu. And I know at some point in the next few weeks because a friend is in town, we'll be hitting Lo Lo's Chicken and Waffles. Oh my, I love that place. The old me would have loved these opportunities to cheat. It would have been fun to have that excuse. The new me is just realizing that for every bad choice I make, there will be 2-3 more good choices I'll have to make to make up for it. Thus - I'll have to be doing this longer. And I don't want to be doing this forever. But - I'm willing to do what I need to do for now.

And I think, for now, I've decided to trust The Lying Scale. Because as of yesterday morning it was 228. It is all going to fall off next week? Dear heavens no. But I'm working on it. And this weekend, because part of me doesn't trust The Lying Scale, I think I'm going to do some measurements. Those suck. Because I remember what they used to be long, long ago. They won't be that good again, I understand that - but I'm going to get a hell of a lot closer than I am today!