Not so focused

A few dinners out. A weekend of bad hotel/interview food. That's apparently all it takes to gain 2 lbs. 196 looked so nice on the way down, but after 194 it looked downright evil. I hated 196. The only thing that scared me more was the prospect of seeing a 2 again! EEEK!!

I've tried to be good, but I have NOT been as good as I once was. Bad food in the house. Dinner out with friends. Unable to easily track my food at work (and since I generally have no time to even cook decent food, where would I get the time to track food?) or any other time. It's been slow, but I got 194 back and held on to it. Today I saw 193. It's day 1 so completely unofficial, but I have my fingers crossed to see it tomorrow morning.

Tomorrow we're doing lunch with her aunt at a The Farm at South Mountain. Unknown calories, but all about natural, organic and healthy living. It makes me happy every time I go. Not so bad. Dinner on the other hand is with The Aunt who lived with us for the last year. It's a thank you dinner for help over the last year and for moving all of her stuff. Smothered pork chops, rice and gravy. I don't anticipate a vegetable - though if I know here there MIGHT be one covered in cheese or overly cooked with butter and salt. That said - I'm not anticipating to be 193 on Monday. But wouldn't it be a nice surprise Mr. Scale???

The girlfriend told me that this is her LAST unhealthy weekend. I know I've heard it before, but I have higher hopes this time. Her "buddy" who supports/encourages beer drinking and less-healthy dinner outings is joining a work based weight loss contest with money on the line. If her Buddy stays on track, I'm thinking my sweetie will as well. Well, at least most of the time. I can confirm that these will be my last smothered or fried pork chops for a long, long time. Gotta get serious. Have to find a way to start tracking better again. Have to find a new job so I can actually make it to the gym again. Have to stay focused.

Focus in my personal life has never been my greatest skill, but writing it down helps. My next quick goal is to be 18_. I'm SO close - but I've been close for a long time. Have to get it. Have to reach a goal to remind myself how great it feels to get there. And how hard you push for the next one. Focus. Focus. Focus. Or something like that.